


Shift

by GirlDressedInBlack



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: AU, Written before The Lie of The Land, slightly dark!Doctor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2018-12-22 02:23:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11957739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlDressedInBlack/pseuds/GirlDressedInBlack
Summary: The Mistress sits in her cage and feels the world shift around her.When her memories finally resettle she is greeted by a cold Doctor and the only other person who can remember the original past.Alternate Universe where the monks actually do change the past and only the Mistress and Bill remember and have to cope with the changes as best they can.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I actually quite like this as an ongoing story idea (which would probably end up shipping Bill and Missy in this new timeline- not going to lie). Say if you want me to because I don't promise regular updates but I can promise I'll work on it.  
> Inspired by this: http://paradisemissy.tumblr.com/post/161226740504/so-youre-just-going-to-keep-me

The Mistress runs her fingers across the keys, breathing in again the stagnant air. It moves in and out like she wishes she could of her cell. She’s been here for a long time now- not quite the one thousand years but close enough. The Doctor had been exceptionally kind for these years.

She supposed.

After all he could have just killed her or left her alone in here without anything to entertain herself.

In return she plays for him sometimes. More she plays for herself and picks music she knows he likes if she can sense him beyond those doors. He brings her food sometimes. When he remembers so when he is hungry which suits her just fine because they seem to be strangely synced after all these years almost cohabiting. 

She likes it best when he brings her stories though. Stories about dying are the best because in her better moments it’s hilarious to hear about how some apes almost died and in her worse moments she can imagine that she is the one who is being killed.

He always has been good at telling stories.

She presses one finger down, letting the note ring out in her glass box. 

Something in time shifts. She feels the shudder go through her as millions of tiny little things change. Her head hits the keys but she doesn’t hear the song it plays.

_ “So you’re just going to keep me?”  _ Echoes around in her mind. Her first question to him. The answer swims from ‘I swore an oath to protect you’ to a simple ‘yes’. 

Ah- so her Doctor- something’s happening to him. She manages to hold the original answer in her mind, grasps tightly to it as she feels everything since then attempt to crumble and reform.

When her memories stop trying to overwrite each other her head aches, processing two different timelines at the same time. 

She forces herself to remain conscious- just enough to sort through everything. All she knows is that her Doctor is in danger, she can’t lose herself now and risk forgetting…

After five hours, twenty-nine minutes and forty-one seconds the Mistress lifts her head.

The keys are imprinted along her face and she has shifted the new memories aside, firmly insisting on the old ones.

She hears footsteps at the door. The familiar weight of the Doctor’s feet hasn’t changed but there’s a lighter step beside it. Judging by the gaps between steps and how many steps are taken against the Doctor’s own stride she would say that it’s a new companion, definitely human, most likely female.

Something from her old memories twinges and she gasps in pain, fighting against her body’s instincts to stand and face the door in this timeline.

She will not stand for him. She is the Mistress and she  _ will _ win.

The Doctor does not call out before he opens the door. Referencing her new set of memories says that this has been the case for several hundred years. She frowns, elbows lightly coming to rest against the keys so as not to bring out any sound. She taps her fingers together, flicking through a few more scenes to get a better idea of this Doctor. 

Her heartbeats pick up as the door opens and she ignores this response, squashing down on- is that  _ fear _ ? Almost but not quite. Apprehension? Nervousness? Something like that. This timeline has invoked in her a slight compulsion to worry at the Doctor’s arrival. She digs a little deeper, rummaging  through millions of moments to find the root of the emotion.

“Missy.” The way he says her name bombards her with all the things she’d been searching for. The Mistress manages to hold back a cry as she lets her face go blank. 

He is displeased. She knows him well enough to know that tone of voice.

She turns around at once, letting herself fall into the memories to at least get her through this moment. Elegantly she plucks up her skirt, curtsying low, head bowed. She forgoes the theatrics.

“Doctor.” She murmurs, voice low. She waits in that position until she senses the incline of his head. Then she stands, eyes finding his directly opposite her on the other side of the glass. She does not blink or look away. 

Rasillon how much she wants him right now- the old her- the one that isn’t from this new timeline.

He nods, going to the only seat in the room and sitting down. She can see his companion is uncomfortable with the whole situation and dips into her mind.

_ Ah. She remembers. _ In fact she’s the one who caused this whole mess. The Mistress is irked, thankful and ever so slightly flattered by the human.

Annoyed that she messed up history so badly and was currently giving the Time Lady a huge headache. Irritated that the human had been able to accidentally corrupt the Doctor more than all of her painstaking attempts to do the same. Grateful that she had because the thoughts it is filling the Mistress’ head with are all incredibly...  _ entertaining.  _

And then flattered by the huge flashing ‘Oh-my-god-she-is-so-attractive-she-could-kill-me-right-now-fuck-why-is-she-so-hot?’ short circuiting the human’s mind. Only slightly though. The human is still only a human.

The human- she thinks the Doctor had called her Bill at some point- follows hesitantly, coming to stand at the Doctor’s left. 

“So you just keep your best friend in a display case?” Questions the human with a touch of outrage the Mistress appreciates. 

The Doctor either doesn’t hear it or doesn’t care.

“Play.” He commands, eyes fixed on the Time Lady.

The Mistress gasps a little, a ghost of a smirk making its way to her lips as she sinks to the piano stool, thighs pressed tightly together. Of course she disguises it as anxiety, even adding a bite of the lip as she flicks her gaze over her shoulder. 

She begins to play his favourite song, automatically finding the keys beneath her fingers.

“She’s evil.” He says after a few moments to his companion, “Aren’t you Missy?” He says louder, as if she couldn’t hear him perfectly.

The Mistress turns, still playing, fixing her eyes on the human’s.

“Queen of Evil.” She mutters demurely.

The look of disgust that passes over Bill’s face is almost enough to make the Mistress break character.

“She doesn’t  _ look _ very  _ evil. _ ” She says firmly. 

The Mistress turns back to the piano.

“In fact- I would say she’s the least likely person in this room to be evil. You’re keeping her in a  _ cage _ Doctor. In a  _ glass cage. _ ” The human lets out a ragged breath, sounding on the edge of tears.

“I’m protecting her.” He says under his breath, voice low as he watches her play.

Bill scoffs.

“ _ Protecting her?  _ She’s playing music at your command in a  _ cage! Do you even know what this looks like Doctor?” _ Bill’s voice trembles and- oh dear- the human is crying now. Crying over her. It’s touching- it really is. The Mistress is almost laughing.

The Doctor is silent.

“It looks like slavery.” She says horrified, “Doctor,  _ it looks like slavery.” _ The Doctor still says nothing and the song comes to an end, petering out into the sound of breathing.

All three of them are still.

The Doctor stands.

“Trust me Bill. Without hope. Without witness. Without reward. She  _ is  _ my friend.” The Mistress hears him lift his arm.

“I have to go.” He says solemnly. He turns and the Mistress does too. She stands from the stool softly, watching him leave. The human stares between them, heartbroken. She strides over to the glass separating them and stops beside the Time Lady.

“I’m not leaving her, Doctor.” She says firmly. The Doctor stops for a moment and a sigh lifts his shoulders.

“She’s dangerous Bill, more than you could imagine.” He says, voice rough. Bill doesn’t even look at the Mistress.

“You keep saying that.” She bites back. Time stretches on, suspending them in uncertainty. 

The Doctor breaks it.

“Please Bill. Be careful.” He says, finally leaving.

The human looks at her, placing a hand against the glass.

“I’ll get you out.”

Something in the more damaged her from this new timeline reacts to this.

The Mistress feels her heart warm, hope blossom there in conflict with her old memories and self.

“Thank you.” She whispers, pressing her hand against the glass, opposite the humans.

“Bill.” She finishes, eyes intent on the young woman’s.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day the Doctor comes again.

The Mistress presumes it’s the next day anyway- her time sense has never stepped out of kilter in all of her lives.

Six months.

Is what it tells her- how long it tells her he had been gone.

He stands outside the door and she thinks for a second he will hesitate.

The doors open and he steps inside, calmer than yesterday. 

Missy feels that strange nervousness well up again and stands. She curtseys as she had yesterday. She notices that the human- Bill- isn’t with him. 

When she looks up again she sees the two large plastic bags hanging by his sides. With the sight of them she remembers the sensation of hunger- something that had plagued her previous regeneration but something that hadn’t bothered this one so much until this moment. 

“I’m sorry Nardole and I haven’t been here to make sure you’ve had food.” He says. Despite the care in his actions his voice is flat. In the small amount of time she can hold his gaze before her new memories force her to drop it she likes to think she can see the guilt which the him from the old time line would have had.

“It’s okay.” She says and it really is. Her new memories don’t want to upset him by saying something wrong. 

Although six months would be far too long for a human to survive for Time Lords it’s still, well, it’s not cutting it  _ too  _ close. She was a lot more practised in going without than most Time Lords anyway and this regeneration really does have an almost worrying lack of self-preservation instincts.

She is very hungry though.

The silence from the Doctor emphasises how different this version is from the old one. The old Doctor would probably have argued with her if she had said that about something as vital as not eating. 

He never had been very good with mental defences- he must have been completely wiped out. 

The Mistress hopes beyond everything- new and old memories alike- that he’s buried beneath everything.

“Where’s your human?” She asks. Her new memories cringe a little at her tone but the Mistress does not take the question back, curious. Has he locked the human up somewhere away from a corrupting influence like her? To stop the human corrupting the version of her that she should be in this new timeline?

The Doctor unlocks her cage and she remains standing until the Doctor sighs and answers;

“I’ve given her leave to speak to you when she wants. If she wants to do something stupid I am at no liberty to stop her.” The Time Lord replies, “Now come and eat.” He says, allowing no argument.

Missy steps from the cage, fingers closed around one of the pieces of metal holding up the heavily reinforced glass. 

As she does she’s hit by anxiety which folds her over, a double blow, strong from her new memories and slight from her old ones.

Something spins and she’s breathing fast- too fast- what’s going on?

Then there’s a hand, tight around her right wrist and fingers biting into the flesh of her left arm, holding her in a resemblance of a standing position.

“Missy!”

Her hearts are beating far too quickly, she can feel them in her chest, too fast, too fast!

“Stop.” She mutters weakly, word slipping from her mouth as her head aches.

“What? Missy!” Shouts that voice again, echoing in her head, too full and empty and too loud and too much.

“Stop it! Stop it! What are you doing? Missy!” And that voice is the Doctor she realises as her pains begin to ease a little.

Her eyes snap open and she manages to lift her head, teeth clenched and eyes wet to look at him in front of her.

He’s scared- she can see that as clear as day.

It feels like a victory even as her vision blinks out.

 

When the Time Lady wakes up the Doctor is gone.

She pushes herself up from the floor in confusion, feeling the surprising softness of blankets and pillows beneath her. The Mistress presses her hands into them, testing the reality.

She looks at the door in confusion, remembering the fear on the Doctor’s face.

Why had the new him done this? Had she held on to the enclosure for longer than she expected past when she passed out and the Time Lord had gathered them to prevent her from damaging herself when she fell? 

The smell of food distracts her from that thought and she looks up. Just beside her is a small table- an end table. Solid. Wood. It sits beside the piano stool which seems to have moved too.

The Mistress stands, feeling none of the pain from earlier and sits on the stool, facing the table.

On it are two white plastic bags, full of food.

The new part of her is nervous, believing the food to be some kind of trap. Missy ignores it. There had never been an instance of that in her new memories and she’s far too hungry to care.

The Mistress sees the knife and fork sitting on top of one of the bags and picks them up before she’s thought about the action and is eating.

It’s only when she’s half-way through the second bag that her hunger has abated enough for her to turn the fork in front of her in confusion, wondering why she didn’t just use her hands like her last regeneration had.

Memories push at her from the new set and she grimaces at the disapproval the Doctor shows of her eating habits, translated through this nervous version of her into something terrifying rather than merely quite annoying.

_ That would explain it _ . She thinks as she rubs at her temple with one hand, the other already going to back to the food although she’s barely processed what any of it is or tastes like. 

Take out of some form according to the bags and plastic packaging- she’d lived off of a lot worse and any food tastes like heaven when she’s not eaten for a long time anyway.

When she has finished she looks around, trying to see if anything else has changed in her enclosure.

Nothing else has other than what she had already seen.

The piano has been moved closer to the walls, the stool that she’s sitting on with it and on the left end the table she was sitting at sat, plastic bags of empty plastic containers with a knife and fork made of metal all that is left of her meal. On the floor are all the blankets and pillows from her bed collected into a semblance of a nest.

She’s briefly surprised by the fact she’s been given things which could be used as weapons- surely the Doctor couldn’t have been so thoughtless?

Of course- this reality’s version of her has been using cutlery for most of the time she’s been in the vault. Obviously he’d conditioned at least some of her more destructive impulses out of her.

The Mistress flops herself back against the stool, thinking. 

Her head falls off the other end and she sitting up again almost instantly, straddling the bench as she stares at the small gap between the glass wall and the bar it should be locked into.

He’d left it open?

Missy feels a frisson of the earlier fear catch her and gasps, hand going to the middle of her chest, fingertips gentle.

She closes her eyes and calms herself.

Anxiety.

That’s all it is.

She opens her eyes again.

The Doctor must think that she’s too scared to get out of the enclosure after the six months and increased entrapment the her of her new memories endured.

It was true.

But that didn’t mean that she couldn’t overcome it. She’d crushed other things limiting her power and she can remember what not being scared was like- all she has to do is recondition herself to the outside slowly. If he kept leaving her cage open then all the more opportunity for it- what she would do with herself then she did not know but when she came up with a plan- when she came up with a plan.

The Mistress stands.

Step 1: Escape the constraints of her mind.

Step 2: Get rid of the monks somehow.

Step 3: Figure out where to go from there.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the angst- it was meant to be slightly more lighthearted than this. Next chapter's on the second of September.

Missy is holding onto the glass frame tentatively yet determinedly, in the same position she has been in for hours, fighting against her own mind as half attempts to recoil from the outside world of her enclosure.

It may not seem that way from the lax way her fingertips press against the glass, smudging small prints around the safely smoothed edge which they barely curl around.

Regardless the interruption of Bill changes that, throws her mind out of balance enough for her to almost fall backwards, stomach roiling and hand far too stiff, seemingly stuck in that tense moment as she tried to make it push open the door.

She stands beside the chair, one hand burning in stillness as the other comes to her chest in a fist as if it could still her beating hearts by holding them together. The Mistress stares wide-eyed at the human, denying her new memories the opportunity to apologise and beg she doesn’t tell the Doctor.

Bill closes the Vault doors behind her, pushing them back with her whole body as she reacts reflexively to that clink of a gap between the glass door and the metal frame of Missy’s cage.

She’s not really scared. She’d been given nothing concrete to fear over and she pities the Mistress somewhat.

Still she lets herself fall back against the door, shocked by Missy’s sudden movement or suddenly feeling all the Doctor’s warnings rushing back to her or something.

“I’m.” The Mistress says- feeling like she has to explain herself but not able to find the words.

She lets herself fall further, making a split second choice between the veritable nest on the floor or the piano stool, and comes down with a thump on the padded seat. 

Better to stay at the same height. She didn’t need pity or to be seen as nothing more than a child.

The Time Lady thinks to try to speak but can’t, eyes locked with the human’s as they size each other up.

Eventually Bill does, walking cautiously towards the seats outside her cell and saying nothing of the door.

“Are you alright?” She asks nervously as she picks up one of the metal folding chairs and drags it as close to the glass as she dares, “Only I think I might have made you jump with the door and I didn’t mean to. Just forgot to tell you I was coming in.” The human says with enough concern that Missy can tell she is genuinely worried but enough lee-way in the words that if the asking has upset the Time Lady she can deny it.

The Mistress breathes in and out deeply.

“It’s okay.” She confirms, somehow wanting to be honest with Bill because the human was so earnest herself. She can’t bring herself to say more, uncertain if she is meant to acknowledge that she had been making what could have been seen as an escape attempt or the fact that it is still viable and Bill hasn’t made an attempt to stop it.

The human fits awkwardly in the chair, seeming to be someone who fits much better with movement. The dark clothes seem strange too although that is all she has seen the human in. She can only imagine her in brighter colours from what the Doctor had told her in the old timeline. She seems too washed out, too small in the clothes she is wearing- they don’t fit the big personality that the Doctor had painted her as.

Bill is silent for a moment, looking at the Mistress.

“Yeah- I. That’s good.” She says, nodding as if the whole situation wasn’t as vividly wrong as it is. Then she deflates, slumping forwards as her hands come up to nest in her hair.

The Mistress waits.

“I tried to save the Doctor.” Bill blurts out, not looking at Missy, “And it went wrong and I just. I know you probably can’t tell but I’ve got to hope that even if the Doctor’s forgotten you’ll somehow have remembered something- even some small part of you because he didn’t and now he’s like  _ that  _ and- you probably don’t even know the difference but I have to try- I have- I have to do something! I can’t just not do anything. Even if I’m just telling you it’s not like you’ll tell anyone- I saw the way you looked at him last night and- you just wouldn’t. I just- I need someone to talk to- someone who doesn’t think I’m going mad.” The human chatters on, clearly distressed but unable to stop herself when she gets started.

There’s too much silence when she finishes and Missy can hear time slowly ticking by around them, counting out the oppressive silence as Bill stares at her, looking for any kind of reaction.

The Mistress purses her lips, the slightest of frowns drawing her eyebrows down.

“When I last took care of the monks it involved the destruction of the family line who had allowed the monks in.” The Time Lady says, understanding that her guess that Bill had invited them in was correct from the extra tension in her shoulders and the slight movement back and away from Missy. “Their civilisation collapsed without the monks to uphold it. They had been under their control for so long none of them had even the locked away memories of what it had been like before their history was rewritten.” She adds, staring into the human’s eyes without moving one muscle.

“Having your life rewritten is devastatingly painful. You know that now. That’s why people forget. I should want to kill you but my new timeline finds the whole idea repulsive.” The Mistress admits plainly.

Bill shudders at the almost threat but nothing can squash the relief and fear mixing on her face like oil and water. 

She stands, throat making an odd noise as she reaches out to the Time Lady despite the glass in the way.

“You. You remember!” She says, waving her arms up and down before coming to against the glass as she moves closer.

And then she bursts out crying and Missy isn’t sure what she’s meant to do at all so stays stock still on her seat, eyes still fixed on the human.

Eventually she stops crying, curled and pressed against the glass.

Missy still hasn’t moved.

“I’m so sorry.” Bill says, rubbing her reddened eyes, “I’m still glad you remember. I’m glad you don’t want to kill me either.” Then she pauses and straightens up, hands in fists by her sides.

“What would happen if we took the monks down now?” The human asks, looking beside the Time Lady’s head, lips thin.

The Mistress can tell what she’s thinking already and it hurts her a little- more than she ever could have expected- and she hears the child’s screaming as she kicks them down into the volcano and she’s laughing but that isn’t her now- neither timeline has that version of her anymore- but she can feel her stomach churning and her hearts beating far too fast and her teeth are clenched so hard together she can feel the tension in the headache like fire which flares into being and her lungs are burning too.

“Missy- Missy!” And there is a hand on her arm and one on her forehead, so warm but she’s clammy herself and she shudders but it’s enough- just enough- to pull her out of it with a gasp.

She squeezes her eyes tight shut and accepts the comfort offered to her, pressing her head hard against a shoulder and wrapping her arms tightly around a back, pulling closer as if her regenerations depended on it.

The human- because it is the human and now Missy is in the present enough to hear the single heart beat which sounds so frail so close to her- holds her gently, hands running over her back again and again in a soothing motion.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She murmurs, her own cheek leaned on the top of Missy’s head.

The Mistress knows in some sense that she should reject the support or remind the human of how dangerous she is but she can’t bring herself to, instead letting herself shudder with every sob which dampens Bill’s too dark clothes.

She’s almost stopped when Bill speaks anything other than consolations, still holding onto her.

“What would happen?” She asks again, hand finding the back of Missy’s neck and gently running her thumb over the skin there as the Time Lady stiffens a little, stopping her from slipping back into the memory.

“On this planet. Now. Everyone would remember what their original past had been. They would tear down the statues and rewrite all the knowledge the monks had eradicated which they could know. There would be world peace as every country shared all the knowledge it had, desperately trying to verify the truth of their world. Everyone would know about aliens and precautions would be taken. The world would become safer.” The Mistress says, voice hoarse, near collapsed over the human.

“Then kill me.” Bill says firmly, sniffing as she pulls away, a hand on each of Missy’s shoulders.

“If it would do all of  _ that _ \- even if there were no monks-  _ kill me _ .” Bill insists, voice beginning to break as she pleads.

And all the Time Lady, ex-Queen of Evil who burned cities just to watch the smoke, can do is tremble.

“I can’t.” She says honestly.

She lifts shaking arms to land on Bill’s shoulders then changes her mind, fingers trailing up her neck to her face as she cups the human’s head in her hands.

“I’m sorry but I just can’t.” The Mistress says with eyes blurring.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter on the 4th of November. Coming to you early from 'I have mania and so am still awake because I have the urge to clean even though I'm crazy busy early tomorrow (technically today now) morning and will probably forget to post if I don't now'.

"Why not? You've done it before for… Not very good reasons. But now- this could save the world. This could make Earth a better place. You would be a hero- you would have done a good thing! I know that you regret the people you've hurt before but could you even bring yourself to regret me? You hardly know me and it would do so much good when all I've done is fucked up everything! Please. Missy." The human begs, hands finding Missy's and pulling them down into her own, gripping them tightly.

"You've got to see how good this would be!" Bill pleads, crying herself with the desperation of the situation and how much she wants to live despite all of this.

"I can't- you. I know I don't know you well but the Doctor- in the old timeline- he spoke about you with such pride. He would never forgive me. I could never forgive me. I don't care about being a hero. When I was locked up in here I declared 'without hope, without reward, without witness'. That is my vow. I am trying to be good. I have no hope. I will have no reward and it won't be witnessed." The Mistress says, shivering, "I know I don't know you but everything you have done that I have heard of emits goodness and hope. To kill you would be evil. The benefits don't come into moral decisions. I'm sorry but I can't kill you so there will have to be some other way." Missy finishes, squeezing Bill's hands and staring into her eyes earnestly and with the certainty only those who refuse all other options have.

"I will make another way." The Time Lady says, eyes hard with strength and the power she has always worn, turned to good ends for the first time in her memory.

"But- if you just-" The human cries, swallowing. She feels guilt even as she tries to summon the strength to argue for her own death.

"No. I will not kill you. I never could." The Mistress finds the words easily and finds them true.

"We need a plan. Another way to defeat the monks." The Time Lady says.

Bill agrees with silence, taking a hand from Missy's and wiping her eyes.

"We need a way to override the connection the monks are promoting through you. Something powerful- something too big for their minds to process. They've got to be promoting this new set of memories using you as the final connection. Time is… Complex… Not that easy to mess with." The Mistress says, thinking aloud.

"They've changed the past and rewritten the world but everyone here who exists still is a fixed point from the old world and they will all have those memories locked inside them. If we can just get in their main control centre and send out a signal so powerful they can't keep it contained- a pure memory of the old world. That should be enough to open the box in their brain shutting away the knowledge they don't need in this timeline. All we need is everything we have!" The Time Lady says, grin coming on slowly as she looks past the woman in front of her.

The Mistress' gaze snaps to Bill who gasps a little, tears gradually stopping and she feels alive, energetic, ready to go. It's the first time her new timeline has felt like this and the emotion is like a beacon in her- a lighthouse in a storm.

The Mistress laughs.

She can't stop herself, joy bubbling through her as she grabs the human and holds her close, laughter shaking her as she cries with it.

Gently, gently, it too comes to a close and the Mistress pulls back, silent.

Her lips have gone slack and she stares past Bill seeming lost.

"Are you alright?" The human asks, eyebrows lowering and one hand going to Missy's shoulder as she stops laughing too. She's still blushing from the close contact with the Time Lady but her worry is far stronger than her happiness.

"What is it?" She asks when her previous question gets no response.

The Mistress doesn't quite look at her but her vision does focus a little more.

"I. All we need. It's the memories in our heads. All we need is the memories in our heads and to be in their headquarters." She says, voice dull.

"And?" Bill asks, grin growing again despite her confusion, "Isn't that good? No machines to rely on, no gadgets to be built?" Her smile falters a little with the Time Lady's lack of response.

"Isn't it?" She asks again.

The Mistress comes back to herself and folds her legs neatly beneath her, hands evenly apart on her thighs as she looks at Bill seriously.

"I can't leave here." She says gravely.

The human laughs, incredulous.

"Well of course you can. The door's right there and I know how to open it. All you do is get up, walk out with me and we save the world!" She declares, smiling.

"No." Missy says calmly, "You don't understand. I can't leave  _here_. I can't leave this space- this room- this  _box_. Something over this changed timeline has made me afraid of the outside of this cage. I can't even open that glass door." The Mistress says, hands balling into fists, frustrated with herself.

"You're in my space and I should hate it but I can't and I can't leave either." The Time Lady says, tears of irritation sinking into the fabric of her skirt as her breath hitches, "Even this crying- I wouldn't ever have cried at this before." She adds, arms wrapping around her own waist.

"I'm- I'm so sorry. I didn't think. That's so insensitive- oh my god! I'm so sorry!" Bill fumbles, blushing and waving her hands in front of her face as if to ward off the unintentional cruelty.

"The Doctor- he must have-" The human starts.

"No." Missy interrupts her, firm, "The Doctor has been very careful, very firm with me this timeline but he never would do anything like that no matter the circumstances. It's psychological. Completely psychological. I've never been sane. The Doctor isn't to blame- it's all in my head." The Time Lady says, eyes meeting Bill's somewhat challengingly.

Bill rears back defensively, hands up.

"Woah- I was just thinking. I'm only human- stupid remember." She jokes, trying to lighten the mood.

Bill takes one of the Mistress' hand between both of her own.

"I'll help you get out." She promises.

The Mistress feels something settle between her hearts and finds herself smiling in spite of the tears and distress and her self-frustration.

"I know." The Time Lady decides upon, looking into Bill's eyes, "I know you will." She says more softly.

The Mistress brings her legs up in front of her, slumping over them. Bill releases the hand she holds and the Time Lady wraps them both around her legs.

She closes her eyes and breathes out, head resting against her knees. Her eyes blink open and she looks at Bill from that position, suddenly exhausted.

"So plan is we get me out of here, find out where the monks' secret hideout is, I go in and blow their systems to smithereens, you humans live in a utopian world?" She asks, smiling a little and feeling more of the her from the old timeline.

Bill smiles, amused by the strange position the other woman sits in.

"Well, yeah. That's all we've got right now. I can try and see what I can find out outside and help you get used to being outside this box again and then  _we_  can go and get rid of the monks. It's my fault and I'm going to help solve it." Bill says without room for discussion.

Missy smiles, offering her hand out to Bill again playfully.

"Team Fix-Our-Mistakes?" She suggests.

"Team Fix-Our-Mistakes." Bill agrees, laughing a little as she puts her hand in Missy's and they shake on it.

They both chuckle at the levity in the middle of their troubles.

"Do you want to try opening the door with me?" Bill asks, nervous with her hand still in the Mistress'.

"I-" The Time Lady goes stiff but the human squeezes her hand reassuringly. Missy bites at her lips and curls up a little smaller but lets out a loud sigh.

"I- yes. I should. We should try." She agrees, swallowing at the fear which clogs her throat.

Missy squeezes the human's hand back.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter's on the 6th of January.

The Mistress sits at the boundary between her cage and the rest of her room, leaning heavily against the left side of the door with her eyes squeezed shut and hands clenched over her knees, knuckles white. She forces a shaking breath out through her mouth and breathes in again through her nose.

Bill sits beside her, right leg pressed against Missy's left in a grounding gesture. She nudges her slightly and the Time Lady's breath hitches and the human grabs her left tightly between her own.

"It's okay. You're doing really well." She murmurs soothingly, squeezing harder until she gets a nod from the Mistress. Gently she releases her hand again.

"Remember when you couldn't even open this door a few hours ago? You're doing really well." Bill says with a concerned smile, leaning against Missy so that she knows that there's someone else with her, "You'll get this in no time."

All the Mistress can feel is heat- she knows she sweating a lot- can feel it in the way her hearts are beating faster and the way every breath tastes damp. She nods again, managing to open her eyes while every other part of her is pulled taut.

"I should be able to do this. This is easy." She whispers, not capable of much more as her eyelids flutter again and she swallows.

Bill is there though, leaning against her side. Missy grabs her hand, biting her lip and knowing she's holding too tight.

"That's okay. You're getting better- you're doing really well and that's what's important." The woman reassures, bearing the pain with slightly gritted teeth.

They sit in silence for a few more seconds, half a minute, each dealing with their pains until the Mistress curls in on herself.

"Enough for now." She manages to hiss out, head buried against her thighs and arms wrapped around them, pulling herself tight as she trembles.

"That's okay. You're doing really well." Bill tells her, used to the way Missy pulls back from her fear by now. The human holds her and the Mistress leans into her, finding comfort in the contact even though the heartbeat is half of what she's used to. She lets out part of a sob.

Bill tucks the Time Lady into her chest, eyes open as she runs her hand over Missy's back,"It's okay. We'll get there. It's okay." She repeats, rocking slightly with her.

The Mistress follows the movements, shuddering as she just breathes, calming herself. Weakly she releases her arm from her own grasp and fists her hand into Bill's shirt, barely managing to keep hold of the fabric as she shakes.

"It's just- I haven't left this space in six months."

Bill can only just hear her even as close as they are pressed together. She sighs and just hugs the Time Lady.

"I'm sorry." She says, no other way that she can reply to that.

Missy pushes them apart a little, not raising her head.

"Don't apologise when it's not your fault." She murmurs, eyes still closed. The Time Lady shivers.

"It kind of is though." Bill reminds her, grimacing.

"Yeah." Missy replies after a pause then;

"You're an idiot." Which holds no heat with her forehead against the human's chest.

The Mistress sighs and sits up again, opening her eyes and loosening her grip on Bill's shirt.

"Again." She says, meeting the other woman's eyes directly.

Bill frowns, "Are you sure? You've done a lot of pushing yourself today and the Doctor will probably come to give you food soon." She says worriedly, hands on the Time Lady's shoulders who feels strangely small despite knowing what the alien is capable of.

There's a moment of contention but the Mistress droops, dropping her gaze and placing her hand over Bill's.

"Okay. We've-  _I've_ \- I've done enough today." She agrees, relaxing already at the thought of not experiencing the irrational fear for a while.

"You have. You've done really well." Bill says with a grin, rubbing Missy's shoulder, "I know you don't think that but you're doing really well." She repeats, knowing how frustrated the Mistress is by the fact she's scared of something so simple and integral to their plan and how shaken she's been by pushing herself enough to even sit at the boundary between her cage and the rest of the room.

"Tomorrow?" The Mistress asks, gaze lifting as she looks Bill in the eyes, "You'll be back and we'll try again?"

Bill nods, "As soon as I can be. We're going to do this Missy." She says certainly.

"We're going to do this." The Mistress agrees, a hint of a smile on her lips as Bill helps her to her feet.

The Time Lady resituates herself at her piano, laying her splayed fingers against the keys as she feels her heart rates gradually resettle.

"Do you want me to close the door?" Bill asks, standing on the threshold.

The Mistress feels a frisson of joy as she realises that she isn't as disturbed as before by the idea of the door being open and smiles at the keys shining beneath her hands.

"Yes. Mostly. The Doctor forgot to close it properly I think- leave it a little bit open." She says, turning to the human as she steps back and puts the glass door between them again.

Bill returns the smile, glad to see the Time Lady's spirits rising already.

"I'll see you tomorrow." She says, waving a little.

"Tomorrow." The Mistress confirms, tilting her head at the door and playing a few notes.

"I know. I know." Bill reassures her as she leaves.

The Vault doors close heavily behind her and moments later the Mistress hears the locking mechanisms click into place.

* * *

The doors unlock and Missy quiets her playing, listening for a second before she's standing, watching him with that strange anxiety, guilt, worry feeling in her chest. She curtseys to him as he enters.

"Doctor." She murmurs, head bowed for the second she holds it.

"Mistress." He greets her back evenly.

It's strange how just a name makes so much difference but she would give anything for him to call her Missy now- a nickname rather than the formality of her chosen title- despite how much she had always wanted him to call her Mistress before.

Some part of her clamours for his approval and she pushes it down as he approaches, almost going to step forwards but remaining in her place, the only outwards sign of her conflicted emotions the slight adjustment of her right foot beneath her skirts.

He looks at the table in her room in confusion, eyebrows lowering. His eyes flicker to her and then back to the table.

"Did you move it?" He asks, genuinely confused as he steps forwards and then notices the pile of cushions and blankets folded beside it along with a wooden chair.

"I- no. I didn't." The Mistress mutters, eyes just not meeting his, "I thought you did." She adds, standing completely still. The Time Lady looks into eyes and the Doctor frowns, hand going to his face as he stares at the new additions to the glass room within the room.

"Then who?" The Doctor asks, lips parted in pure confusion as he sees Missy is telling the truth, "If Bill or Nardole had done it you would have known and each of us would know if we'd done it. Neither Bill of Nardole have access to the codes to get in either." He frowns and then a strange blankness seems to come over him.

"I've brought you dinner." The Time Lord says, eyes glazed slightly. He walks closer to the enclosure and the Mistress feels some shock go through her, stepping up to the glass.

"Doctor?" She asks softly then more concerned when he barely seems to hear it, "Doctor?" The Mistress says, volume increasing as she begins to truly worry. He opens the door and she forgets her current timeline, grabbing his arm.

"Doctor?" The Time Lady asks, eyebrows descending, grasping both arms now and shaking him slightly.

He doesn't show any kind of reaction and she chances a brush against his mind which sends her reeling and- Rassilon- she can't even tell what's happening in there!

A ghost of sentience passes over him as he releases the bag on the table and she feels anxiety begin to press in again and lets him go, backing away as if stung.

The Doctor steps out and closes the door his cold gaze filtering back over his face as he types in the code and the glass cage seals shut again.

"Goodnight, Mistress." He says as he turns and leaves.

The door to the Vault closes behind him and she hears it seal shut again moments later.

"Goodnight, Doctor." She whispers to the ghost of him.

The Time Lady steps back up to the table and opens the bag, pulling each plastic container out.

They're her favourites. That peanut chicken thing, rice and chip-shop gravy.

There's no knife and fork.

At the bottom of the bag is a small slip of paper with seven digits on.

4763205.


End file.
